You have so many things you want to accomplish. What’s stopping you? I know for me, my mind likes to show up and start all that nay saying, making excuses…and this can lead to staying stuck.
Enjoy this amazing post by my lovely friend, Erin Stutland and tell us about the change you are itching to make and how you will do it after reading her advice. Let me tell you, I just LOVE her message and the 3 tips are crucial if you want to guarantee changes in your life whether it be with fitness, health, a new job, motherhood,etc… Erin’s advice is so spot on to clear up all that mental clutter that can really put a hold on your life.
The MOST Important Conversation You Will Ever Have
When we are looking to make changes in our life, whether it is to lose weight, improve our relationships or save more money, it’s common to start taking a whole bunch of actions without looking at the one place where all great change begins; the mind.
We sign up for a marathon, we incorporate another date night into our relationships, or we make a single payment in attempt to saddle up our debt.
I am all for massive action taking, because without it, we are just dreamers, hoping and wishing that things would change.
However, I am amazed at even my own neglect to listen in on the conversation I am having with myself about the change I want to make.
We are bombarded with slogans like your thoughts create your reality; your thoughts become things, but how often do we stop before embarking on any new challenge, to check in with what we REALLY think about the challenge that lies ahead.
Recently, I decided that I was ready to take my income to yet even another level. I got clear on the dollars I would like to be bringing in. I even set a date of when I would like it to happen by.
I wrote down actions and possible ways that I can scale my business.
However, a night later, I realized I was tossing and turning in bed, worrying and wondering how on earth I was going to do that.
My own thoughts doubted my success. I hadn’t even considered asking myself what do I need to believe in order to make this a reality?
Any success or failure begins in the mind because that is where we decide what we are capable of or what is possible.
If you aren’t sure what thoughts and beliefs you will NEED in to achieve your next goal, big or small, start by asking yourself this:
What are my biggest concerns regarding this challenge or change?
For me, I would say:
• I am afraid I won’t be able to handle the workload.
• I am scared all I will do is work and will have to sacrifice all other aspects of my life.
• I not sure if I am worth charging more.
• I am afraid I might lose clients.
Just by naming your own fears or concerns, you have found the place where you need to begin to change.
While concerns are valid and important to consider, FEAR is simply False Evidence Appearing Real and is the VERY thing that could keep you from having what you want.
But how do you change thoughts and beliefs that seem to be ingrained in the very cells of your being?
Here are a few simple tips to begin to change what is being planted in the very fertile garden of your mind:
Having an awareness of your own fears is the first step to lasting change. Imagine a small child being scared of what might be hiding in the dark basement of their house. Once you simply turn all the lights on in the basement, take their hand and show them what is REALLY down there, a great deal of fear subsides.
By becoming aware of your thoughts, you shine a light on what is there which will instantly give them less power over you.
2. Create affirmations.
Make a list of your fears and then go ahead and write down the opposite of those fears. EX: I am worth ever penny. I easily balance work and personal life. Clients are drawn to me because of the amazing work I do.
Affirmations are a powerful way to change your beliefs. Affirmations are even more powerful when you couple them with some sort of physical activity. Feel free to download THIS rockin’ playlist I created WITH spoken affirmations. It’s great to run, bike, dance or walk with.
3.Give yourself the parental SMACK DOWN.
When you find you are tripping out about all your fears, it can be challenging to simply tell yourself wonderful things, like you are worth it. Especially when you are so not believing it.
That is when we call in the BIG DADDY guns. The Course In Miracles calls thoughts of fear, worry and doubt an attack on yourself.
I like to think of it as a wild child misbehaving. So, I put on my stern parent hat (I don’t have kids, but I imagine if I did, this is how I would get when they misbehaved). I simply say to that voice in my head, “I am sorry, but I will not let you talk to me that way. Until you are able to behave and be nice, we are not having this conversation.”
And every time that voice wants to jump back in, you simply say to yourself, “NO. I said, we are not having that conversation and I will not tolerate that behavior.”
It’s feels a little silly, but I think being playful is sometimes the best way to create change.
The most important thing to remember is that in order to create lasting change, you will likely have to change the story you are telling yourself about what you would like to create. If you had the beliefs and thoughts in place already, you probably would already have what you want.
The next time you go to set a goal, ask yourself, what do I need to believe? What do I need to think in order to achieve this?
It could be the most important conversation you have.
In the comments below, tell me what is the one change you are looking to make in your life and the thought or belief that you need to have in order to make it a reality.
Erin Stutland is a life coach and fitness expert. She is the creator of the course Magical Manifesters, which allows you to set up clear goals and a plan of action to achieve them. She is also the creator of Shrink Session, a workout that combines dance, martial arts, yoga and of course, positive affirmations. http://www.erinstutland.com